Barefoot Bohemian

Stopping in to say I haven't died. I'm still here; senior year of college wiped me, but I graduated. Bachelor of Arts in psychology and music, bam! And I've been looking for a job for 5 months...

All the part-time jobs have turned me down, and the really good research assistant position at a hospital downtown had people a lot more qualified (since people with Masters are going for them). So, yeah, still looking. Meanwhile, I'm watching soccer. Baseball season is over (don't tALK TO ME, THE ORIOLES SHOULD HAVE GONE TO THE ALCS!) and hockey is in a lockout (it's not like we get anything other than the NHL over here, so no European teams or anything), so Real Madrid and Chelsea are getting all my time.

It's a sad, lonely life, I know.

Clocking in at almost 30 pages, my honors thesis is officially revised and submitted. My last final got finished at 10.10, and my write-up to react to my minor is just now completed. I am officially done my work as an undergrad.

I have no idea of what to do with myself now...

This is the first time in years I've practiced upwards of 2 hours a day for several consecutive days (almost a week), and my wrist and thumb have thrown in the towel. They're revolting. For that matter, I've probably lost my mind; it's up and vacated the premises. My life right now is a little wild...

Also, I now have an alum shirt. And ordered my cap and gown. I feel old.

my second to last semester was over. I start back up in January for the last time. I think when the last day rolled around I gave myself something of a panic attack, because no one can do denial like I can and that day just wasn'tcomingnothanksI'mjustfine. But now, my BA in psychology is officially done. I did my thesis and got an 85 - not as high as I'd thought I'd do, and it ended up meaning I got a B+ in the class, which pissed me off, but I'm done. Next semester I get to do ANOTHER thesis, this time for my Honors program, but thankfully, I already have the topic and the general methods outlined. Other than that, I need to take two classes for my minor (Criminal Procedure and Victimology), finish my music major by finishing up the applied performance and lessons credits, and take my IDS (the required senior seminar on interdisciplinary studies). If I can fit it in, I want to either take German IV or audit the class. I'm psychotic. Maybe all this downtime during winter break will remind me that I honestly need more of a rest during the school year.

Grades for this semester are as follows:
Sex Offenders - A-
German III - A-
Piano I - A-
Lessons - A
Band - passed
Music History - B+ (also pissed about this one, can I never actually keep an A when I get it midsemester?)
History and Contemporary Issues (psychology capstone/thesis class) - B+
Leaving me with a 3.57 GPA. I can do better.

And the schedule for next semester:
Criminal Procedure
Victimology
Lessons
Band
Recital
Piano II
Honors Thesis
Harlem Renaissance (IDS, but hopefully changing to Arab and Islamic Feminism)
German IV (if I can possibly fit it in)

In other news, the whole 'cold and sunless' thing winter loves to pull is really grating on my depression. I'm getting even less motivated recently, and that's not a good thing. It's becoming a challenge to wake myself up at decent hours, and I'm pretty sure I've already skipped my medication a couple times this week. Thankfully, cold is actually good for my fibromyalgia, so that's one thing out of the way for right now. Bad news is that my anxiety and near-paranoia are also controlled by the medication so I have been having something of an upswing in those areas. I really need to get my shit sorted out, maybe I can write more over the break and try to keep myself busy. My room definitely needs to be cleaned...

At 8.30 in the morning. I'm not a morning person, but I can do this! ... I think. I have a listening quiz as part of it, and it's cumulative, so that'll be a blast. I currently have the tracks on a playlist on repeat. I'm pretty sure I got an A on my Cognitive Psychology final, and I think I managed a B/A- on my Theory but I'm not sure since none of my grades have come back. Having a bit of a rough patch with one of my best friends, so hopefully a summer of not living together will cool things down. I'm living with her and [Bad username or site: @ livejournal.com] next year, but we all get different rooms, so that will be less of a strain as well. Hope everything works out.

Yosh! Second day back at college and it's a snow day :).

So my break was veeeery relaxing, but not nearly long enough. I ended up getting a B- in Research Methods, thank all that is holy, because I seriously wondered if that class wasn't going to do me in and make me flunk out of college and life in general. I ended up getting a B in Mus Theory III, A-'s in Violence in Politics and Social Psychology, and an A in flute, so all in all it wasn't a bad semester. Didn't make the Honor Roll, but I can keep my scholarships still so I can keep going to college. Good times. I'm so thankful that that semester is over, because the last several weeks (months) I was getting almost no sleep in between the RM project and all my other class work. It was not a fun time. No breakdowns, thankfully, but all of my friends group got very snappy and moody with each other, myself included. This semester is already looking much better, if only because there's no Research Methods.

Break consisted of staying in bed, reading, getting my Driver's License (!!! Finally, I know), and getting a new flute (!!!). Also catching up on shows like Community, Supernatural, and Hawaii 5-0. Holy shit, Supernatural! Can't wait for the last episodes! Spent holidays with my mom's family, getting to see my cousins and all my aunts and uncles, which is a big plus. We usually end up missing a couple each year, but it was one big party this year :). I do love them all, despite how much they may drive me crazy with their politics. It's what family is supposed to do, I know. Also got to see several high school friends, including my four best friends and some of my UU family. I know I love NC and college, but I still miss all of them like crazy and find myself having conversations with them in my head. I can just hear what they'd say in some situations, it's crazy.

Also, I get to have a proud big sister moment, because one of said best friends came over and my brother ended up in her winter show! She's an actor/director and has a youth theater company in B-more, so when she mentioned that she had several parts open in this collection of Shakespeare scenes she was putting on, I was like, my brother's an actor, and he ended up filling all three roles, despite there being ten days between getting the script and going to performance and never having done Shakespeare before. She came up to my family after opening night and raved about him. I was so proud!

But anyway, drove down to school on Sunday with my three best school friends (We're the Fantastic Four. We're that dorkish). First day of classes happened yesterday, and while I'm not looking forward to Theory IV, I know it'll be interesting so I'm keeping positive. I'm pretty sure I'll end up dropping the Criminal Justice minor though :(. With a double major, I haven't been able to get enough classes out of the way to fit in those three other requirements. Wish me luck with the rest, though!

Finally recovered from the major food coma I was in most of yesterday. Thanksgiving was pretty good - my grandmother and uncle joined us at our house and we all managed to have a pretty good time. My uncle was pretty distracted, it seemed, but that makes sense since he and his wife might be separating soon. I'll have to talk to my cousin when I get back down to college, since she spent the holiday with her mom and siblings she might know the other side of the story. I hope this all works out, but the parental generation in my family isn't the greatest with communication, no matter who it's with. The children seem to be a bit better at that, thankfully.

I'm finally all caught up on NCIS and Community, as well as being mostly all caught up on Modern Family. I still need to work on Supernatural, but I have an 8 hour train ride tomorrow, and I can only spend so much time reading on how art was used as psychological warfare during the Cold War. Once I get back to school, we enter finals crunch. Bleh. I have two 8-10 page papers, four (and a half) finals, and a jury to prepare for in the next three weeks, as well as a performance on December 13th. I'm hoping to get to the 17th with my sanity still intact, but it's kinda 50/50 by this point.

I'm settled back completely into school now, though it's already gotten so stressful that my OCD has me compulsively cleaning and straightening things. I'm back home right now for the Jon Stewart/Stephen Colbert rallies tomorrow, and I'm totally excited. Also tomorrow night, I'm performing in a little musical get-together thing for Halloween that the Music Department is throwing. It's going to be pretty cool; I'm performing a Katherine Hoover piece called "Winter Spirits" and also doing a duet that the other flutist in the program wanted to do. Very atonal and clashy, so good mood music.

I GOT MY TICKET FOR HARRY POTTER TODAY!!! As you can tell, I'm stoked.

I've also gotten in to the new "Sherlock" series on BBC. It's so well done, and I can't wait for next season :).

Also, LIVERPOOL WON AND TORRES SCORED! All is alright now.

*originally posted to shatterd_wings*